No One to Blame But Myself

I believe in living healthy and taking care of one's self.  The problem is I don't walk the walk!  So when I went for my yearly physical with Dr. E. today, I had no one to blame for the outcome but myself.  You see when I went last year  my cholesterol and blood pressure were borderline high.  I also was overweight.  He gave me 6 months to lower my weight and stats through exercise and diet.  I promised him I would and jumped off of the table and went on my way.  I had a vision in my head of what I would do and how I would do it.

Well, one year later, I am still overweight.  My cholesterol and blood pressure are still borderline high.  I still have the vision in head.  Now the good news is my weight was down by 5 pounds! I'm still 40 pounds over weight, but whatever!  Let's just enjoy the victories no matter how small they are.  So Dr. E asked what I've done to try to get healthier.  When I said I've eaten healthy the last two days, he didn't laugh!  I told him I can see myself eating great nutritious meals.  I can see myself working out and participating in warrior dashes.  I can see myself rocking a size 10 outfit.  The problem is I can't seem to  make my dreams a reality.  Dr. E asked me if I could see myself taking Liptor and suffering a stroke! Touche, Dr. E, touché!  (No, he didn't actually speak the words, but the look implied such!  I"m just taking creative license here!)

So I left the office feeling defeated and sorry for myself. I felt like I let Dr E down as well as myself.  Since turning 50, my body and my mind seem to be turning on me.  I have never had problems with my blood pressure and cholesterol.  I have never had problems accomplishing a goal when I put my mind to it.  I've never had trouble remembering things.  I was always smug when my friends were whining about the same health issues.  I would just laugh and say not me!  Well, yes me!  Apparently our choices eventually catch up with us, now don't they?

So, what's the game plan, you ask?  Well, may be you didn't ask, but I'm going to tell you anyways.  The plan was to go get fake nails put on!!!!!!!!  Go ahead and put close your mouth before you swallow a fly.  Let me explain myself.

I don't believe in making New Year's resolutions. I believe in focusing on setting a theme for the year and working towards it.  So my theme this year is to be nicer  to myself.  You see  I put others before me.  I always have and I always will.  It's my nature to nurture others.  In doing so, I forget myself.  So this year I'm trying to make more time for myself.  Some of the most enjoyable things for me to do is get a pedicure and a manicure.  I don't do it often because I don't have the time or the money.  Well, that's changing.  With the acrylic nails, I have to take care of them on a regular basis.  I know it sounds funny, but I will now be forced every two weeks to go to the nail salon and just sit and let someone pamper me for 45 minutes.  It also invested some money in some body oils.  Once again it sounds ridiculous, but I don't take the time to even put lotion on after the shower.  My skin is dry and flakey. Nothing worse than looking at my fat, white, dry calves every morning!     Tomorrow, I'm going to go and buy some new clothes.  All of my clothes are ill fitting due to the weight.  I always say I'm waiting to lose weight before I can buy new things.  Well girls, we all know how that works out!

So what's all this got to do with lowering blood pressure, cholesterol and obesity?  My thought is if I just take the time to love me for who I am right now, then  may be I will be motivated to improve on who I can be.  I have bucket list and I'm not ready to leave this world just yet.  I believe I still have a lot to offer my family, school and community.  I know that God has a plan for me, and he is in charge.  I just think I can carry out his plans better if I like who I am...fake nails and all!  Wish me luck!  It will be a fight, but I think I'm worth the fight.

Make Every Day Count...
Denise